"Do you want a copy of your receipt?" Not!

I only have one more day of work.  And then I'm done. with. food. service. forever.  Forever!  Jamie has banned me from food service ever again, which I whole-heartedly accept.  It's hard to imagine life without it, I suppose, since I've been doing some form of it for most of the past four years.  I'm sure I'll do fine.  I will never again have to be on the receiving end of the explanation "It's for here, I mean, I'll be drinking it here, but can I have a paper cup?"  Not only are these people wasteful, insane, thoughtless, earth-hating individuals, but I don't care where they drink it, I just need to know what kind of cup to put the drink in.  Damn it.  Nor will I stare at people as they ignore me and whisper about the menu.  Or as they continue to stare at the menu as they order, refusing to look at me.  Nor will I have reply, "I'm doing well..." in answer to their inquiry as they interrupt to bark out their order (no doubt in a paper cup to be consumed within the cafe).

So...  Will I like people more?  Will I enjoy coffee again?  Will I still tip generously and glare at those who do not?  I think yes.

And Pittsburgh!  It's feeling more real.  Jamie and I have submitted applications plus deposit for a two-bedroom apartment (in anticipation of many visitors!) in the Regent Square neighborhood, on the eastern edge of the city.  One of the main reasons we picked that area was to be within walking distance to the East End Food Co-op.  Which made me realize how neurotic we both are about food.  But, seriously, check out their bulk section!

I receive two types of responses to the information that I'm moving to Pittsburgh, generally.  The first, most common, is pessimistic in nature.  Sarcasm as to the merits of Pittsburgh (especially from people who have never been there).  Fear about the thought of moving "so far away" and "change".  Disdain about the sports teams (really? do I look like I give a shit about their football/baseball/jai alai team?).  Skepticism about the "return on investment" of a degree in Library and Information Science (this one might be my favorite--unsolicited--from Passive-Aggressive Seattle Guy, a regular at my almost-former job).  The second response, less common but exceedingly more meaningful, is excitement.  Change!  Going back to school!  Adventure and expanding one's worldview and "finding one's self" and living somewhere new!  Clearly, I subscribe to the latter, and thank you to everyone who has been encouraging!

Jamie and I leave for Colorado in a week.  I can't wait!  I'm feeling the need to travel, and barring some crazy international trip (not in the financial picture at the moment), I suppose that roadtrips to the Southwest and hiking trips and moving across the country will suffice.

Dreaming of Pittsburgh

It's so close.  My last day in food service ever is June 30, which means that the end is in sight which means that it seems farther away.  Coincidentally, July 1 is when Awesome Summer begins, so I suppose I can hang on until then.

I find myself dreaming about Pittsburgh, often.  At work, in my bed at night, walking to catch the bus.  I'm excited to go back to school, to move across the country, do something entirely different from anything I'm doing now.  Besides, Edward Abbey is from Pennsylvania.

Everything school-related is manifesting itself much better than anticipated.  I've been placed in an internship at the Carnegie library of Homestead (slightly outside the city of Pittsburgh), working in children's services.  This comes with a 3-credit scholarship, combined with an additional 3-credit merit scholarship, for three semesters.  Yesss!  Considering that I accepted admission without this information, it comes together nicely.  I'm concerned about finding a place to live, but it's probably too early to worry about that.

I'll be leaving in August, which is quite soon, as I'm realizing.  Before then, I plan to northwest the hell out of this summer!  Hiking, camping, biking, picnicking.  I'm also going to Colorado with Jamie in July, to practice for our roadtrip across the country, of course. 

Can't wait!

Cathedral of Learning

I decided to go to the University of Pittsburgh because, why not?  I received so much advice--mainly absurd and unsolicited.  You know, like taking mushrooms and going on a vision quest or getting extremely drunk and going online, deciding, accepting.  Which makes me wonder:  is that how other people decide?  Shit.  Is that what I should have done?  As always, the decision was anti-climatic.  This can be surprising for people, but I think it's because I had already made my decision about a week and a half ago and was making sure that it felt right before I admitted it to myself and committed to it.  Jamie and I were looking at a map of the United States, talking about the road trip we would take to get to whichever school I chose.  As I traced one proposed path, it ended in Pittsburgh.  Weird.

I am so excited!  Now it feels really real and I can begin to plan, hope, dream.  So soon, my days of food service will be over!  I will take an incredible cross-country road trip with Jamie!  My life will change in crazy, dramatic, subtle, unexpected ways!  It will be the end, the beginning of so many things.  It already makes me nervous, stresses me but it's time.

Plus, the Cathedral of Learning!  Ding!

Bellingham Complicates the Situation

Jamie and I went to Bellingham this weekend and I feel more confused about my looming decision.  I keep telling myself to STFU and decide already but I can't!  We stopped at Tulip Town outside of Mount Vernon for the annual Tulip Festival.  I needed to check this off my "Things to do in Washington before I leave" list.  It was a typical spring day, with unpredictable and blustery weather.  We left after I finished working on Saturday, so we passed most of the crowds as they were leaving and we were entering.  The rain left and the sun came, lighting the sky in that surreal way as though after a storm with a faint rainbow.  The tulips were beautiful, of so many shapes, sizes, colors.

We continued on to Bellingham, where we stayed in a (too) expensive, (too) tacky hotel by the freeway.  I agonized over where to eat and decided on Boundary Bay, if only for the beer sampler.  Yes, the ESB is still my favorite.  The next day--an obscenely gorgeous spring day--we went to the Mount Bakery (vegetarian Eggs Benedict!) and walked around Western.  I had to show Jamie the legendary MHB statue, the fountain where I skinny-dipped after graduation, my favorite study place in the library.  We walked down to Boulevard Park from Fairhaven, lounging in the grass like days of old, watching the undergraduates engage in adorable flirtation and frisbee dates.  We dined at Flats, an excellent tapas bar in Fairhaven that lived up to my memories of the place.

Now for the confusion: I love Bellingham!  I don't want to live there now, but spending time there again reminded me of so many things that I did enjoy about the nature of the town, and many of the things that are lacking in Seattle.  Yes, I did remember some of the things that I didn't like--the incestuous nature of the place (I only saw six people I recognized on this trip), twenty-one-year-olds running around everywhere on Saturday night.  It made me confused about Ann Arbor, which is larger than Bellingham but is probably similar.  This was the largest hesitation toward the University of Michigan.  But on Sunday, sitting in the sun outside the Firehouse Cafe, I wanted it again.  As I've said before, with every day comes a different idea of what I want.

Now For a Coin Toss

I mailed forms declining admission to Indiana, Simmons, and Rutgers this weekend.  I panicked slightly as I pushed them into the outgoing mail slot--am I narrowing my future?  (Well, yes, but I have to choose just one.)   Remaining: University of Pittsburgh and University of Michigan.  The deadline for Pittsburgh has been extended to April 30, giving me more time to not think about it.  I have had two phone interviews for internships in Pittsburgh and should hear back by the end of the week--hopefully making my decision easier.

I am tired of receiving advice from people who know nothing about me, or the programs, cities, or all of the above.  I feel conflicted: after a recent conversation with an LIS professor at the University of Washington about the two schools, I was certain (for about twenty minutes) that I should go to the University of Michigan.  Apparently, in the elite world of library science academia, Michigan is more prestigious.  Whenever I mention that it is one of my final contenders, people seem very impressed.  And I like it.  Until I remember that I don't really care about prestige.  I went to Western (anyone who went to WWU and has friends who went to UW understands) and loved it.

My future is starting to freak me out again.  Maybe it's just the decision that still must be made.  Or the huge change that comes with the decision.  When I started this process last summer, I started dreaming about the grand trip I would take before I started school.  Ideas of Russia, Argentina, Japan, or anywhere.  This isn't going to happen, which is realistic and sensible (money, money, money).  The plan is for a great American roadtrip to the school of choice.  Which is good.  But the epic trip seems so far away.

PDX

When I learned that I had an entire (*gasp* entire *gasp*) weekend off, Jamie and I immediately booked Amtrak tickets to Portland for us and the bikes.  I hadn't been there in years, and had certainly never biked it, or navigated it myself.  I love weekends and I love Portland. And trains.

We spent the weekend eating, biking, and doing touristy things in the sun.  We stayed with Jamie's friends, Laura and Jeff (and Clarke and Pot Pie), in Northeast Portland by Alberta street.  The neighborhood felt so comfortable, with adorable 2- and 3-bedroom houses, constantly reminding me of the neighborhood where I grew up in Olympia, and so different from everything I've seen in Seattle.  Within walking distance to their house, we ate at three places and had coffee at two.  Everything was great but the winner: Extracto Coffeehouse.  It's a small roastery...  Their single-origin Ugandan espresso with hints of blueberry...  No one plugged into a laptop...

We biked into downtown, visited the end of the farmer's market at PSU, then went to the Saturday Market, then headed to Rogue Brewery for a sampler.  After several games of Uno with newly-made friends living in Olympia, two samplers and a shot of hazelnut rum, we zig-zagged to Voodoo Doughnut for a vegan powdered sugar doughnut and a bacon maple bar.  Back over the river for dinner with Laura, Jeff, and Laura's aunt and grandmother.

The next day we spent hours in Powells, miraculously leaving with only two cookbooks.  Next to Deschutes Brewery for their sampler and some Black Butte, with lunch, before catching the train, in a less-than-straight motion, back to Seattle.

I knew I shouldn't really ever visit Portland because I would want to pack up and move there (or just never come home).  It's true.  If I wasn't moving across the country in the fall, I would seriously consider moving down the I-5 corridor to the home of Stumptown Coffee.

Names in a Hat

Now to decide.  It's really always the most difficult part: the decision.  Decisions with deadlines.  As it stands, I am choosing between the University of Michigan, University of Pittsburgh, Indiana University, and Simmons College.  I'm leaning away from Indiana University because Bloomington does not seem as interesting/exciting as Ann Arbor, Pittsburgh, or Boston.  The acceptance deadline for both Simmons and Pittsburgh is April 15, before I will be able to visit any of the schools.  Partially, it doesn't matter because all of the programs are good.  But I will be spending two years there (or more) and I want it to be incredible.  But any of the four would be new, different from anything I've ever experienced.  But cornfields or the Great Lakes?  Allegheny National Forest or the Atlantic coast?  It doesn't matter, maybe, because no choice is a bad choice.

What to do, what to do.  This determines my future for the next few years.  Better make it good.  But it's close, nearly tangible.  When I make a decision, it will make it real.  I will be leaving in the fall, going back to school so that I never have to work a minimum wage service job again.  Anything, everything about this is an adventure.  I'm agonizing over the decision, yeah, but it'll be fine.  It's exciting.